In the past two days, two people accidentally addressed me as Palin. One of them a fellow progressive and the other, our “maintenance director” or simply the guy who fixes stuff around the office and can get me a fancy notebook if I am extra nice. Our names certainly have a few letters in common, but I believe that’s where our similarities end. For starters, I don’t look like a mischievous librarian in my Tina Fey glasses; instead, I resemble an elementary school teacher, who is in the habit of sending notes home and giving Fs for behavior. I am also, amazingly enough, more educated and received my degree from a more reputable institution (see Back to School issue below). Additionally, though I am not lucky enough to have lived the quintessential American story of eating moose burgers and shooting rifles in Alaska (I am a naturalized American citizen), I have had an American passport for five years longer than Palin. I’ll spare you the list of our differences, but as you may guess, it’s rather extensive.
So what is it, that je ne sais quoi, driving my colleagues to confusion? I hope it’s the one similarity we do have – neither will be the vice president.
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7 comments:
So, I didn't know that shooting "riffles" was part of the American story. How exactly do you shoot a small wave caused by shallow, fast running water? Surely, they are very hard to hit. Palin must be a crack shot.
For us, vieuw from Belgium, Palina seems the most dangerous Barbie that America made for a long time...and Polina the sweetest...
Thrawn-
Thanks for pointing out my mistake ever so tactfully. I am just a poor little immigrant, you must not hold it against me.
I've long said it. We should close the borders. Clearly immigrants are contributing to the decline of American culture. Misspelling words, causing the current economic crises, and attacking true American heroes such as Ms. Palin. By the way, Palin dares to live the American dream of coming in second in a beauty pageant, having a retarded kid from a redneck husband, and becoming the president by first becoming the vice president to geriatric Maverick...You know, kind of like Anna Nicole Smith marrying the old rich guy for his money, then screwing him to death. Yep, the only thing Palin has to look forward to after the presidency is Slimfast commercials and years of drug abuse. But, I digress. Immigrants suck.
Sorry to be late to reply. I appreciate your optimistic conclusion--I only wish I could be as certain. Alas, I don't live in New York any longer, so I get to interact with the so-called real people on a fairly regular basis. They like Mrs. Alaska (as I would prefer you call her, since I think there are many millions of young women who are more representative of the name Miss America than this "cocky wacko" (that really sums her up, in my opinion)), and liking somehow matters to them more than their own economic interest! Suckers. By the way, did your two mistaken colleagues escape with unbroken noses? I would think a sucker punch would be an involuntary reaction to being called such a name.
Colleen-
I guess what I am doing is practicing wishful thinking. I shut my eyes really really tight, cross fingers on both hands and toes on both feet (quite dexterous), and chant "please please please." Even in NY, Sarah appeals to many. I guess it's the undeniable hockey mom charm. I myself plan to be a soccer mom and hope to be distinguished from a pit-bull by more than lipstick.
we want more blog posts. More, more, more!!!!
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